There is a strong bond between men and beads in Turkey. Tesbih — worry or prayer beads — are used by men from all walks of life in Turkey and are an essential accessory to long, passionate debates. Tesbih could be the easiest topic of conversation started in male-dominated coffee houses or upscale social clubs in Turkey. Despite growing female interest in tesbihs, they are still an almost-exclusively male domain. The artisans, designers, salespeople and customers are almost all men. It is even seen as a sign of strong masculinity in different communities in Turkey.

As a woman, it is a mesmerizing journey trying to learn and engage Turkish men in the talk of tesbih. It is believed that you can tell one’s social status, preferences and even personality traits from the tesbih they own and how they carry their beads.

The first time I entered a tesbih store at the famous Grand Bazaar of Istanbul, a middle-aged shopkeeper asked with an uninterested voice, “Who will you buying the tesbih for?” Before I could even answer he said, “If it is your boyfriend, you should not spend much, but if it is your dad or uncle, then I can show you some high-quality tesbihs.” Mustafa Bey, a tesbih salesman for 15 years, said, “Young women buy tesbihs for their novice tesbih-aspiring boyfriends, who fail to appreciate their value. They lose the tesbih promptly, which leads to quarrels between the couple.”

Indeed, when you sit down at a cafe or a restaurant in Turkey, briefly watch the men as they put down their cellphones, cigarette packages, lighters and tesbihs. You may appreciate the love and the strong bond Turkish men feel for their tesbihs, keeping them as close as their phones.