AMSTERDAM, Netherlands — Vanessa, 19, was always a rebellious and spontaneous teen. Someone who liked being the center of attention and didn’t let anybody tell her what to do. After she became a teenager, she was always hanging around “tough boys” from school. They made her feel protected and safe. And just like other teens, she had boyfriends: Some were really nice, but others treated her badly.

“And when she had a nice boyfriend, she started calling him constantly, testing his limits. On the one hand she denounced rules. On the other hand, she yearned for them,’’ her mother, Mary, told Al-Monitor.

Vanessa had trouble at school. One day she got an invitation from her teacher to talk about her extreme behavior. At that time, she had already converted to Islam. Vanessa was fully covered and wore a face veil. “You might as well go straight to Syria,” the teacher said. After that conversation, she dropped out.

But beneath this exuberant personality lurked a girl who wanted nothing more than acceptance. At the age of 12, her mother asked her what she wanted to become when she grew up. Vanessa said that she wanted to get married and have kids at the age of 16.